


Lost and Found

by smaragdbird



Category: The Terror (TV 2018)
Genre: Canon Compliant, M/M, Missing Scene, Possibly Unrequited Love, past Gibson/Hickey
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-14 15:07:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29297898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smaragdbird/pseuds/smaragdbird
Summary: William Gibson doesn't know what to make of Hodgson's presence in the mutineer's camp
Relationships: William Gibson/George Henry Hodgson
Comments: 1
Kudos: 7
Collections: The Terror Rarepair Week 2021





	Lost and Found

Billy didn’t know what to make of Hodgson’s presence amongst the mutineers. He hadn’t understood why Cornelius had wanted an officer on board in the first place, unless it was to show up Crozier. Hodgson though hadn’t joined them voluntarily. He had quite literally stumbled upon them.

“Do you have someone to share with?” Billy asked when they stopped sledging for the day and set up camp. 

Hodgson shook his head. He had glanced at de Voeux earlier only to be ignored, whether deliberately or accidently Billy couldn’t tell.

“Come with me”, he said, tilting his head in the direction of the tent he had claimed. He hadn’t really planned on sharing it with anyone if he could help it. Certainly not Cornelius. He’d probably catch a knife in the ribs of snoring.

“Thank you”, Hodgson mumbled. He seemed out of his depth, adrift, with nowhere to turn to. Not like the officer Billy had served under on the Wanderer. The same officer who had vouched for him so he could obtain a position on this expedition.

The road to hell was truly paved with good intentions.

“We packed in a hurry”, Billy said, waving in his hand in the direction of blankets and furs. There was no proper bedding here, only what they had been able to grab while the beast had ravaged the camp.

“It’s more than what I brought”, Hodgson replied, gratefully sinking down to the floor. 

Billy sat down at as well. It had been a long day. A long two days actually. They had sledged through the night, wanting to get away from the monster as far as possible.

“I was surprised to see you here”, Hodgson said without meeting Billy’s eyes.

“Why?” He asked sharply.

“I did not think…you and Mr Hickey didn’t seem close since…”

“Did Irving talk to you?” Billy asked. He knew it and he wished Cornelius was here so he could rub it in his face.

Hodgson nodded. “He was confused about what he had seen and what he should do about it.”

“What did you tell him?”

“That he should keep it quiet. That these things happened.” Hodgson glanced up at him for a moment. “But later he came to me and told me that Mr Hickey had coerced you…Is that why Hickey killed him?”

How much could Billy tell him of the truth? Cornelius was dangerous but Billy still believed that a smaller group had a better chance of making it.

He shook his head. “Lieutenant Irving was at the wrong place at the wrong time.”

“So if it had been me…”

“He would’ve killed you.”

“And yet you’ve chosen to follow this man?” it was the first time Hodgson raised his voice. A spark of the officer Billy had known in Africa.

“Captain Crozier got it wrong. The mutiny wasn’t planned by Cornelius or by Tozer. It was my idea.” 

Hodgson stared at him in shock. “Why?” He asked eventually, aghast as if he had to re-evaluate everything he knew about Billy.

“A smaller group is quicker. Needs less food. We can make it, they won’t.” He knew that to be true like the sun setting in the west. “I want to live. Don’t you?”

Hodgson closed his eyes and exhaled slowly as if in great pain. “God forgive me, I do.”

Billy reached for his hands and held on tight. What was it what Cornelius had said yesterday? “We have the rest of our lives to wrestle with our conscious. For now, we just have to do what we need to survive.”

Hodgson opened his eyes and nodded. “You are right, Mr Gibson.”

Billy squeezed his hand, then let go of it. He began to strip out of his outer clothes, piling them in a corner of the tent. Hodgson followed suit. There was a piece missing from one of his boots and Billy briefly wondered what had happened to it.

“I know it’s a moot point but thank you for telling Irving not inform on us.” If he had known that back then, would he have made a different choice? Wondering about it was a moot point, too.

“I do not want to see you harmed”, Hodgson replied. There was something in his tone that made Billy pay attention even before he touched Billy’s arm. “I am sorry I could keep Mr hickey from harming you.”

There was a hunger in Hodson’s eyes that Billy understood only too well. He turned towards Hodgson, noticing he did not shy away from the closeness.

“You did not know.”

“Still, I…”

“Shhh”, Billy interrupted him, resting his hand against Hodgson’s face. “What is done is done. We cannot change it.”

It was no surprise when Hodgson surged up and kissed him. Or when he pushed him down and devoured him. Billy had never been one to pass up an opportunity and this, oh, Cornelius would hate this. Perhaps it was foolish to anger a mad man with a knife but Billy was not above petty revenge.

Afterwards, tangled in each other’s arms in the dark, Hodgson said, “I’ve wanted you since Africa.”

Would it have changed things if Billy had known that? Would they still have ended up here? 

“You have me now”; Billy said because no one could change the past.

“I do, don’t I?” Hodgson said, and he sounded almost happy.


End file.
